EVERY STORY HAS TWO SIDES
Mar 26, 2025
Photo taken by Derrick Threadwell from Unsplash
Proverbs 18.17
EVERY STORY HAS TWO SIDES
"The first to present his case seems right, till another comes forward and questions him."
History text books give different narratives to the same events. When the Japanese army invaded Singapore during World War II, one narrative presents it as the liberation of the country from British imperialism. Another puts it as an act of aggression fuelled by Japanese imperialism.
Not only text books but news networks also give a “spin” the news they report. Conflicting narratives confront us daily on social media, leaving us undecided and confused, or else decided but prejudiced. Prejudice prefers its own view above all else. At the personal level, we give a slant to how we perceive or present a situation. The slant always shows us in better light.
Knowing this default tendency of human nature, we should not be quick to jump to conclusion. How true, the first to speak seems to have all the facts—but not so. Upon questioning, more facts may emerge, and give a fuller perspective of the situation.
The proverb here lays down an essential principle in judging a situation. We must hear both sides. God gives the same instruction to Moses and the judges of his day: "Hear the disputes between your brothers and judge fairly.... Do not show partiality in judging; hear both small and great alike. Do not be afraid of any man, for judgment belongs to God" (Deut 1: 16-17).
If we are a party in a conflict, we must listen to the other side. We like to think we are right, even though we may be wrong. As fallen self-centred human beings, we invariably slant a story (consciously or unconsciously) to favour ourselves. Of course, at times, we may be right — in certain aspects. So is the other person — in other aspects. Understanding how he or she feels takes the acrimony out of a conflict situation.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow counsels us, “If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each man's life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.” Let us not be hasty to jump to conclusions. If we think and pray about a matter, and hear the other side out, we may arrive at something quite different.
Do I hear both sides, the other side?
